WHY WE LOVE CHILDREN..in case you’ve forgotten!

A Christmas smile or two for you….and hopefully they’ll be with you all next year.  Happy Holidays from What’s Up in Seal Beach!

1) NUDITY
I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat, ‘Mom, that lady isn’t wearing a seat belt!’

2) OPINIONS
On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his mother. The note read, ‘The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents.’

3) KETCHUP
A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar. During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer the phone. ‘Mommy can’t come to the phone to talk to you right now. She’s hitting the bottle.’

4) MORE NUDITY
A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women’s locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, ‘What’s the matter, haven’t you ever seen a little boy before?’

5) POLICE # 1
While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, I was interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old. Looking up and down at my uniform, she asked, ‘Are you a cop? Yes,’ I answered and continued writing the report. My mother said if I ever needed help I should ask the police. Is that right?’ ‘Yes, that’s right,’ I told her. ‘Well, then,’ she said as she extended her foot toward me, ‘would you please tie my shoe?’

6) POLICE # 2
It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the station.. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake, was barking, and I saw a little boy staring in at me. ‘Is that a dog you got back there?’ he asked.
‘It sure is,’ I replied.
Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van. Finally he said, ‘What’d he do?’

7) ELDERLY
While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, ‘The tooth fairy will never believe this!’

8) DRESS-UP
A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, ‘Daddy, you shouldn’t wear that suit.’
‘And why not, darling?’
‘You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning.’

9) DEATH
While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our minister heard the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his collar wilt. Apparently, his 5-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead robin. Feeling that proper burial should be performed, they had secured a small box and cotton batting, then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased.
The minister’s son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought his father always said: ‘Glory be unto the Faaather, and unto the Sonnn, and into the hole he goooes.’ (I want this line used at my funeral!)

10) SCHOOL
A little girl had just finished her first week of school. ‘I’m just wasting my time,’ she said to her mother. ‘I can’t read, I can’t write, and they won’t let me talk!’

11) BIBLE
A little boy opened the big family Bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages.
‘Mama, look what I found,’ the boy called out.
‘What have you got there, dear?’
With astonishment in the young boy’s voice, he answered, ‘I think it’s Adam ‘s underwear!’

Whoops…careful on that fruitcake for the holidays!

The American College of Asthma, Allergy and Immunization (ACAAI) warns against certain food items as a holiday gift.   Dr. Myron Zitt (really) says “Food allergens lurk in all kinds of holiday treats, from fruit cake to cookies.”

Instead send them a gift certificate to one of Seal Beach’s GREAT restaurants.  (Some with 20% discounts!)

Other suggestions are stay out of the pet store, avoid costume jewelry, (24 karat gold is OK) ..and 100% cotton is a better choice than angora or cashmere.

For the complete list go to:  http://www.lifelinescreening.com/health-updates/tis-the-season-to-give-allergen-free-gifts.aspx?SourceCd=LETT-709

“Here kitty, kitty..you have a new house!”

A CHRISTMAS GIFT FOR OUR FURRY PALS.

I’m sure you all know that there are about 15 million more cat owners than dog owners in the U.S.  So naturally there are more kittens and cats that are looking for a place to stay.

Seal Beach Residents are trying to help and the groundbreaking ceremony for the start of construction of the Helen Sanders Cat Facility is scheduled for this Saturday, December 18th, 2010 at 12:00 noon at the Care Center, located at 1700 Adolfo Lopez Drive, Seal Beach…behind the Police Station.

The  Seal Beach Animal Care Center is privately supported by the citizens of Seal Beach. No public funds are used.

The shelter  is a pro-humane, no-kill animal shelter, housing both dogs and cats. It has seen its feline population increase markedly over the past several years. This project will provide safe, comfortable housing for its many felines in a facility that protects them from the elements and minimizes the spread of disease.

The late Helen Sanders was a visionary feline advocate, and promoted what is now called “Trap, Neuter, Release (TNR)” before anybody knew what that meant. She single handedly left a legacy through her teachings about humane treatment of homeless animals and responsible pet ownership in the community around Seal Beach.

After years of struggling to make this dream come true, the SBACC is finally able to build this facility in her honor.

The public is invited to join us for this joyous occasion to celebrate the life and vision of Helen Sanders. We also need help in raising much needed funding for construction of the project. The SBACC is a 501 c 3 non-profit organization.

Refreshments will be served. Event will go – rain or shine.

So you think you’ve owned your car too long?

Mr. Allen Swift of  Springfield , MA. received this 1928 Rolls-Royce Picadilly P1 Roadster from his father, brand new – as a high school graduation gift in 1928.

He drove it up until his death last year…..at the age of 102 !

Allen and the Rolls were the oldest living combination of how long an owner had owned and driven a new car.

It was donated it to the Springfield museum after his death. It has 170,000 miles on it, still runs like a Swiss watch, dead silent at any speed and is in perfect cosmetic condition. (82 years)

That’s approximately 2000 miles per year…

Still runs  like a Swiss watch. (Remember them? We used them before we had cell phones to tell time.Car looks  like a million bucks..which is pretty close to its value.  It was built when people could afford to take real pride in their work. (Got paid less but worked more hours. It was made with REAL heavy gauge steel too…didn’t need to worry about mileage because gas was 15 cents a gallon!)

Doesn’t get any better than that.

Another Thanksgiving Day in Paradise

HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO ALL!

Send a photo to your friends and relatives.

FBI & SBPD Get Together on Armored Car Training

On  November 10 the Seal Beach Police Department, in conjunction with the FBI and the California Armored Car Association hosted a seminar at the police station.

The program was designed to familiarize law enforcement robbery and homicide investigators with the personnel and equipment associated with the armored car industry.  The industry is suffering from an increase in both robberies and the killing of their guards.—

They brought five armored cars to demonstrate how our officers should investigate them during armored car robberies and the killings of their guards.  The 60+ police officials present complimented the program.

“Even in the best of times, departmental resources seldom seem adequate to guarantee the level of public safety and public service expected by the community,” said Chief Jeff Kirkpatrick.  “We appreciate being able to take advantage of these external resources.”

City Service Calendar for November and December

• Seal Beach City Council Meetings:  December 13th & January 10th.
  

November

• Thanksgiving Day Holiday – City Hall Closed:  Thursday, November 25th & Friday, November 26th
  

• Annual Holiday Tree Lighting:  Saturday, November 27th, 4:00 p.m., Eisenhower Park
  

December

• 30th Annual Holiday Parade:  Friday, December 3rd, 7:00 p.m., Main Street
  

• Breakfast With Santa:  Saturday, December 11th,  8:00 a.m. – 10:30 a.m., Eisenhower Park
  

• West County Connectors Project Open House:  Tuesday, December 14th, 6:00-8:00 p.m., Council Chambers
  

• City Hall Closed:  Friday, December 24th – Friday, December 31st
  

Thanksgiving Holiday
Wishing you and your families a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday!!  Just a reminder that City Hall will be closed in recognition of the holiday next Thursday, November 25th and Friday, November 26th.

Holiday Closure
Just a reminder that City Hall and the Maintenance Yard will be officially closed from Friday, December 24th, through December 31st, and reopen for regular business on Monday, January 3rd.  Public safety operations will continue as normal with police, fire, and marine safety personnel.

Here are the details of the BP/Arco clean-up in Seal Beach

This is a four page letter from the Orange County Health Care Agency to ARCO confirming OCHCA’s receipt, approval, conditions, and comments about the excavation workplan at the ARCO site that WUSB received from Jan Sledge, Executive Asst. to City Mgr Dave Carmany.

Its a lengthy document but we believed that those living in the area affected want to know all they can about what will affect the value of their homes as well as their health.

Excavation was proposed in the Revised Corrective Action Plan (CAP) dated July 19, 2010 that was approved by OCHCA on August 10, 2010. OCHCA is also requesting that ARCO prepare a workplan to conduct soil vapor sampling in the Bridgeport area before the dual phase extraction activities begin.  The sampling must include soil probe in the streets and alleyways and as many of the subslab probes as ARCO is able to gain access to.  The soil vapor sampling workplan must be submitted to OCHCA by December 15, 2010.

To read the letter completely go to:file:///Users/billhalpin/Desktop/ARCO%20Station%20%236066%20-%20Excavation%20Workplan.pdf

Little love for tax increases by California Voters…but?

A new poll done by Greenberg Quislin and Rosner   http://www.greenbergresearch.com/index.php?ID=2548 found that California registered voters see no easy solution for the state’s budget woes. They want the new governor to focus on cutting spending – with little support for tax increases – but their highest priority is protecting spending for health care and education.

They do not want to cut services that they think are important to the state. Indeed, they want to increase spending on K-12, college and universities and health care.

By nearly three to one they believe the budget can best be reduced by cutting waste and inefficiency rather than cutting programs like health care and education.

There are some other great revelations that the independent pollsters felt came out of the research that was published in the L.A. Times on Friday November 18.  For full text go to: http://www.latimes.com/news/local/la-me-poll-20101119,0,1562210.story – -and read the story by Cathleen Decker.

Something for a Rainy Day

BEACH CLEANUP is rain or shine in Seal Beach tomorrow November 20. From 8 a.m. to Noon at 15 First Street, Seal Beach. We will have FREE Yoga 9 to 10 a.m. under a canopy or two if necessary due to rain and its taught by Karen Kazanci, owner of Leaping Lotus Yoga http://leapinglotusyoga.com/ And please bring canned food for “New Life Beginnings” www.newlifebeginnings.wordpress.com – if it is raining and you just want to drop off cans of food, please drive into the parking lot, pull by the blue canopies on the left of the parking lot on the grass and we will gladly take them from your car for New Life Beginnings – they need our help.

Kim Masoner Save Our Beach

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